Terms of Service
Hi. These terms explain how You May Have Been Rude works and what we each agree to when you use it. We've written them the way we'd want them explained to us. By sending a note through this site, you agree to what's below.
1. What this service is
You May Have Been Rude lets you send a short, private, anonymous feedback note to a business or someone in a public-facing role — a server, a shop owner, a front desk — about one real interaction you had with them.
It's the private alternative to a public review. The note is delivered by email with a link to a private page. It is never posted publicly, never attached to a rating, and your name is never included in it.
Notes are for businesses and public-facing work roles. At launch, we don't deliver notes to private individuals at personal email addresses.
2. Who can send a note
You can send a note if:
- You had a real interaction with the recipient, in their business or public-facing role. No made-up stories, no notes on behalf of a grudge that isn't yours.
- You have a valid payment method — sending is paid on purpose, because paying makes it a deliberate act, not a drive-by.
- You follow the Acceptable Use rules. They're part of these terms.
3. How sending works
Every note passes through the same steps:
- Screening first. Every custom message is screened before it can be sent. Ready-made messages are pre-approved wording written by us.
- Authorise, then capture. At checkout, your payment is authorised — held, not taken. We only capture (actually charge) it when your note passes screening and is sent. A note that is blocked is never charged: the authorisation is simply released.
- Human review for the grey zone. If a custom message is borderline — strong language aimed at a person, unclear intent — a person on our team reviews it before anything sends. You're told it's under review, and you're only charged if it's approved and sent.
- One note per recipient. You can send one note to the same recipient per 30 days. No pile-ons, no repeat targeting.
4. What it costs
Prices are in Canadian dollars (CAD) and shown before you pay:
- Ready-made note (our wording, your pick): $2 CAD
- Custom note (your words, screened): $5 CAD
There are no accounts, no subscriptions, and no surprise fees. You pay per note, only when it sends, as described above.
5. Delivery and refunds
We back every note with a simple guarantee: delivered or refunded. If the recipient's mail server won't accept the note (a hard bounce or an undeliverable address), you get a full, automatic refund — no forms, no chasing us. The details live on our Delivery & Refunds page, and they're part of these terms.
One honest limit: once a mail server accepts a note, we can't control which folder it lands in. We do everything technically possible to land in the inbox — which is exactly why the guarantee is built on confirmed delivery instead.
6. Anonymity — and its honest limits
We never put your name, email, or payment details in the note, and we never tell the recipient who sent it. That's the deal, and we keep it.
Two things we won't pretend otherwise about:
- Your words can identify you. If you describe an interaction only one person could have had, the recipient may guess. Write accordingly.
- Your payment goes through Stripe. Like any real payment, it exists in Stripe's records under your card details. We never see or store your full card number. And if a court or lawful authority ever compelled disclosure, we would have to comply — no anonymous service can honestly promise more than that.
7. What we can promise, and what we can't
We run this service carefully and in good faith, but it is provided "as is." A note being sent doesn't make its contents true — senders describe their own experience, and we screen for abuse, not for perfect accuracy. That's another reason notes are private: they're one person's heads-up, not a public verdict.
If something goes wrong on our end, our liability is limited to the amount you paid for the note in question. Nothing in these terms takes away rights you have under British Columbia consumer law that we can't legally limit.
8. Changes to these terms
If we change these terms in a way that matters, we'll update this page and the effective date before the change applies to new notes. Notes already sent stay under the terms you agreed to when you sent them.
9. Governing law
These terms are governed by the laws of British Columbia, Canada, and any dispute will be handled in British Columbia.
10. Talk to us
Questions, concerns, or a note you think we got wrong: youmayhavebeenrude@proton.me. A human reads it.